Girls, Girls, Girls and the Media

There must be a thousand new initiatives that have the goal of enabling and inspiring young girls to become powerful girls and women.  Women have been pushing for equal treatment and equal pay since the 1920s, and it's only right seeing as how women and girls control billions of dollars in buying power, manage to start business and families consecutively and has increased productivity of legislatures and governments across the globe.

But here comes the twist.  Despite the moves being made to tell women that they are worth every penny they spend (times 1000), despite philanthropic processes to send underrepresented women to college and the consideration given to girls in "depriving" cultures who don't have the freedoms of every other girl in America to be expressive and an individual there is still unfair treatment within the orientation, there are divisions among class, color, size and education, even style, hair color and culture separate women.  Whether it is the media or the economy of our melting pot of cultures that is procuring this division and pitting-against of women in America the effects aren't going unnoticed.

Ok, this year marked a ton of instances where women were put in the limelight.  Sarah Palin continued to show her ass, Oprah stopped the NBA Finals so that she can end her show, Chaz Bono decided to become a man, and without further description, Basketball Wives, all of the Real Housewives series, Bridezillas and Tough Love have done their part in MANipulating how entitled, selfish, mis-informed and disengaged women, allegedly, are.  

Devoted Mom or Education Thief

And then there is the legislature.  How many of us watched as Kelly Bolar, a devoted mother, was sentenced to 10 days in jail followed by probation after being convicted of "stealing" an education for her son.  When in fact all she did was send her son to an elementary school in her father's neighborhood, it was a better school than the inner-city school in her immediate neighborhood.  School officials claim that the cost of the education was approximately $30,500 for the 4 years her son was enrolled.  

I thought the charges were erroneous, in a country where we are pushed to do what we have to do to survive, get in where you fit in, and make sure you get everything you are supposed to get.  In this particular case the charges weren't overturned but Bolar's sentence was decreased to just probation.  (no one has said anything about the disparities in the funds applied per student and how they differentiate between inner-city and suburban Ohio public schools).

It just all seemed a bit harsh to treat this loving single working mother this way.  I mean, I can see if she was a party animal that would abandon her child for days at a time, partying and doing who knows what. It's not like she murdered her child or was forcing him to steal from neighborhood pawn shops.  

What does this tell black single mothers?  And I know a ton of black single mothers who are doing everything they can for their sons and daughters to halt them from becoming a statistic.  Unlike some other people that have been thrust into the limelight.

Casey "I'ma good mother" Anthony ... I'm just sayin!

Casey Anthony caused the state of Florida to spend more than a million dollars in search of her dead daughter and a truth in her web of lies.  She walks free.  

While single mother Janelle from popular MTV reality show 16 and Pregnant has about 4 drug-related infractions under her belt, and manages to make upwards of $75k a year.

In fact, the entire cast of 16 and Pregnant and its spinoff Teen Mom and Teen Mom 2 have made young girls familiar with the possible popularity of having a baby so young.  Which is funny, because this show was originally thought to show young women how challenging it is to become a mother too soon.  There are now reports of girls getting pregnant in hopes of being cast in a reality show.

Ain't that a mess?  This is what we are teaching lil white girls!

While lil Muslim girls are being killed by their fathers for becoming too American, this country really has a to invest a lot more when it comes to NOT streamlining the mindset of women into the uber-materialistic, commercial media whores that the majority is clearly becoming.  

Strippers being swept off their feet to marry football players or rappers and small town girls catching the eye of tech and internet CEOs is a rare occassion, but thanks to media at the rate we are going, women can get away with murder, as long as they look the part... 

Amanda Knox was recently freed of all charges of murder in Italy!

Black in the City is a realist type blog...I'm just calling them how I see them.  The American viewer is becoming seduced by the wiles of women who are of a small community among us.  There is a backwards movement going on here, and its moving much faster than the Girls, Inc. of the country, even the Barbie mantra of independence has been tainted by the bumping and grinding of our newest clown apparent representative 

Fried chicken necklace, raw talent? Confused much?

So, here's the call to action.  

1. Turn off these shows that depict women as confused followers of false celebrities.  
2. Read a book by one of the countries most esteemed female authors (um, the editors at Vogue, Cosmopolitan and ELLE aren't authors, so reach for a little Maya, Iyanla or Zora)  
3. Become a mentor and do what you can to speak some common sense into these young girls heads.  Let them know that every marriage doesn't have to start out of pity and end with divorce, not having a daddy is no longer an excuse, self confidence does not mean you can last the whole day in high school without taking off your 4 inch stilettos, creating classic style is long lasting and helps maintain your balance so that newer issues can be confronted as they come.  
4. Get organized, write a plan that doesn't include sizing yourself up to everyone else. 
5. Get help when you need it, stop internalizing and, by all means, be a woman...if anything else, remain steadfast with your standards and growth pattern.

(drops the mic) Stay pretty Divas

ttyl.

ok, so after I posted this I was forwarded this video of a little girl performing Nicki Minaj's Super Bass (which is a song laden with expletives and sexual innuendos), this further influences me to teach my kids the "Ain't I A Woman" speech Sojourner Truth graced an audience with back in 1851.)

The Blessings in Redirecting

It seems as if every other blog I write is meant to illustrate some new frontier in my life.  I don't necessarily believe that this one is going to be any different.  So, if you don't feel like being inspired, having a quick little revelation, or even finding out that you are not the only one switching up the scene, then I suggest you stop reading ... everyone else, roll with me.

So business is looking up and I am preparing to launch my newly renovated website, BethanyEastPR.com (don't click on it yet, I said I am preparing, so be patient).  The website will illustrate a few of my PR products.  And by products I mean, a la carte public relations and media services that any small business will be able to purchase, track and see a noticeable ROI (return on investment).  I began to formulate these products in late 2009 when some local business owners that I had befriended had a desperate need for PR but no particular budget that included hourly billing for such a service.  I began to offer my services under a monthly contract, however that wasn't as lucrative for myself as each business owner would basically over work me.  It was a mess.

In early 2010 I decided to dive into my own lane of public relations, actually producing events and marketing opportunities for small businesses in the Detroit area, it was a rocky road, but pretty soon I began to earn a little recognition for my efforts.

Then came the move to San Antonio, where at first, I struggled to locate my new niche market.

The entire process was a lesson.  And I decided, towards the middle of last year that in each instance of interaction with a potential client or entrepreneurs to take a few notes as to what it was that I was doing, learning and thinking.  

I've since filled a 5-subject notebook with contract drafts, proposal outlines, budgets, book ideas, event ideas, dinner ideas, tasks lists ... whatever it was that I dreamed or was motivated to expound upon, I wrote it down. And now, I have a string of blogs that will soon become staples among my lineup of posts.  I will feature everything from commentary on politics, fashion finds, dates on the city, advice, business and marketing tips, twitpic tours and guest bloggers.  Its been a tough transition, but I must say, things are looking up.

It all comes down to being redirected.  

If you're a true #BlackInTheCity blog reader you know that I am all for making decisions without excuses, stating my opinion and creating action.  I take things in stride and I am not easily angered. And most importantly I always accept when to make a change, and how to recognize when that change validates itself in both my business and my life.

Don't get me wrong, most of these "changes" can often times be considered, failures .. but, I'm an optimist and everything's relative.  Right?

That's where the blessings lay.  Everytime I start a new contract or project I will encounter my fair share of obstacles.  As I quickly make moves to learn new skills and make new contacts, I'm often redirected .. not meaning to say that I am given the run around but, hey, it happens.  But being steadfast and diligent in all of my tasks is a lesson that I am constantly being taught.

I've come into a situation that has created a zen within me.  I wish I could tell you what exactly it is, but that would ruin all of the new things I've got lined up for you.  

TTYL

 

... my idea of when one of those "changes" becomes a redirected blessing in your favorite ...

FIRED!! You kidding right?

It's been a while.  And I feel that I owe all of my faithful readers an explanation...which is weird because I am never the one to explain myself to anyone.  My motto, "Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies", and "What you don't know, won't hurt you", but, it's time to grow up.  So here it goes.

I got a job.

There.  I said it.  And I didn't want anyone on any of my social networks to ever know that I was currently employed and therefore not fully devoted to creating and growing my PR business.  You see, it's all about perception, especially when I've voiced so heavily that I am an entrepreneur, I didn't want to appear to others what I felt I'd become, a sellout ... a clock puncher.

After I left my long time stint at Blue Cross as a procurement specialist I vowed that I would never want to work as a "regular" employee again, I wanted and needed to be in control.  I hadn't done what I wanted to do in a while so I began creating my own lane, getting recognized as a resource when it came to idea/proposal creation and event planning.  Having a few connects and experiences under my belt helped in giving me the confidence to get more.  The "out of sight, out of mind" factor didn't really matter as I began social media marketing for a few startups, especially when I relocated to Texas.  Nevertheless, push gave in to shove and I my contracts soon expired.  Looking for new opportunities in my new base-town was a long and drawn out process and little writing gigs, marketing excursions and small events weren't paying the bills.

So, I got a job.  (There, I said it again)

I should've just tried a little harder.  That's what I am telling myself now.

Fast forward to the present.  I lasted at the large retail store for all of a month before the manager, scared for her own job, fired me.  They FIRED ME.  I have never been fired in my life, and in all honesty was on the verge of giving my 2-weeks notice.  But to be told that "We don't want you anymore." is a new concept.  I have laid low on a few non-paying clients or people that have totally misused my advice thus creating negative press or missed opportunities.  Trust me, I know that its better to just drop some people from your life.  But to be on the receiving in is not a good look.  I began to question my work ethic, my ability to coexist with other people.  I had gotten FIRED ... to me that's like being randomly arrested for something I didn't do.

Then it dawned on me, I wasn't supposed to be working there in the first place.  I am a business owner, which may, at any point, during my day carry the title of customer service representative, but only when it comes to handling MY customers ... not those of anyone else.

Ofcourse I understand that being a business owner mean you are always striving to make your clients, customers and the public happy...but in the same instance you have the power to select your clients, create customer involvement on your territory and speak directly to your public ... as a clock-puncher I couldn't select who would come into the store, who I worked with, what to say to the people I came in contact with ... sure there was a nice discount on uber-designer clothes, but was the fact that they told me when to come and go, what to wear and how to wear it even worth it?  Not at all.

And what's with the fact that I would've had to give them 2-weeks notice before I could leave ethically, but they could lose me at the drop of a #dime ... I mean, seriously?  That just urks me.

Yep, I got a job.  And got fired.
And I am hiring my old life back.  And this time, it's full time.

TTYL